Maternity wear for giants, apparently
We live in a country where you can truly obtain just about anything you want. Between Walmart and the internet, just about anything is available to you. With one exception. Maternity clothes that actually cover your entire protruding belly.
I don't consider myself the largest lady in the land, but apparently to manufacturers of maternity garb I am the exception to the rule. (I think the rule is either (1) be 5'1" tall or (2) enjoy feeling the wind on your unborn child.) When I first learned I was pregnant, I was happy to get the maternity clothes of a friend of mine who was quite well dressed whilst carrying her children. That worked great until I was about 6 months along at which point it became evident that she is significantly shorter than me. All of a sudden NO shirt is long enough to cover either my belly (while wearing low rise item on the bottom half) or the darling panel of blue cloth (while wearing high-rise, itchy item on the bottom half).
I went to the Motherhood store to ask if they had any particularly long shirts, maybe even a minidress I could pair with something, that would cover me and my growing self. The clerk was about 5'3". She explained that she'd never had that problem when she was pregnant. No kidding.
My OB is about 5'10", so I asked her what she did for the last few months, besides hibernate with a pint of Ben & Jerry's. She admitted it was hard to find longer shirts, but recommended the Japanese Weekend brand. I guess if I was an OB I could afford the $48 T-Shirt. On ebay. Used, no less.
On ebay, someone listed a top that got under Japanese Weekend. I looked into it, but found it was a Swedish brand of clothes. Great! I thought, That's a whole nation of tall women, maybe this brand can be found here. It can. In boutiques. Oh, and on the internet. When I googled the brand name, which happens to be BOOB, I came up with a very interesting set of websites. Found lots of thigh-high vinyl boots (which coincidentally wouldn't cover my growing belly), but it took some looking to come up with the maternity wear I was after. But after I saw the prices I realized the brand name translated from the original Swedish means "costly garments you can wear for about five minutes".
Alas. I guess the situation has a few solutions. I could (1) learn how to sew, (2) become an OB so that I can afford a $48 TShirt, (3) move to Stockholm to work as an OB, thus saving on shipping, (4) revert to the Donald-Duck style of maternity clothing our mothers got to wear or (5) spend the next 7 weeks holding my shirt down and walking bent in half so that I'm properly covered. My budget tells me I won't be doing numbers 2 & 3 (can't afford med school). My pride tells me I won't be doing #4. Reality tells me it won't be #1 either. So I guess it's back pain or an up-draft for me for a while.
I don't consider myself the largest lady in the land, but apparently to manufacturers of maternity garb I am the exception to the rule. (I think the rule is either (1) be 5'1" tall or (2) enjoy feeling the wind on your unborn child.) When I first learned I was pregnant, I was happy to get the maternity clothes of a friend of mine who was quite well dressed whilst carrying her children. That worked great until I was about 6 months along at which point it became evident that she is significantly shorter than me. All of a sudden NO shirt is long enough to cover either my belly (while wearing low rise item on the bottom half) or the darling panel of blue cloth (while wearing high-rise, itchy item on the bottom half).
I went to the Motherhood store to ask if they had any particularly long shirts, maybe even a minidress I could pair with something, that would cover me and my growing self. The clerk was about 5'3". She explained that she'd never had that problem when she was pregnant. No kidding.
My OB is about 5'10", so I asked her what she did for the last few months, besides hibernate with a pint of Ben & Jerry's. She admitted it was hard to find longer shirts, but recommended the Japanese Weekend brand. I guess if I was an OB I could afford the $48 T-Shirt. On ebay. Used, no less.
On ebay, someone listed a top that got under Japanese Weekend. I looked into it, but found it was a Swedish brand of clothes. Great! I thought, That's a whole nation of tall women, maybe this brand can be found here. It can. In boutiques. Oh, and on the internet. When I googled the brand name, which happens to be BOOB, I came up with a very interesting set of websites. Found lots of thigh-high vinyl boots (which coincidentally wouldn't cover my growing belly), but it took some looking to come up with the maternity wear I was after. But after I saw the prices I realized the brand name translated from the original Swedish means "costly garments you can wear for about five minutes".
Alas. I guess the situation has a few solutions. I could (1) learn how to sew, (2) become an OB so that I can afford a $48 TShirt, (3) move to Stockholm to work as an OB, thus saving on shipping, (4) revert to the Donald-Duck style of maternity clothing our mothers got to wear or (5) spend the next 7 weeks holding my shirt down and walking bent in half so that I'm properly covered. My budget tells me I won't be doing numbers 2 & 3 (can't afford med school). My pride tells me I won't be doing #4. Reality tells me it won't be #1 either. So I guess it's back pain or an up-draft for me for a while.
posted by Left Coast Sister at 9:18 PM
3 Comments:
come on! You just have to go with the styles! Haven't you seen all those celebrities with their bare bellies exposed to all the world?? That's the way of things now! I'm sure all your friends won't mind.
your post made me grin and be glad that it's you and not me :)
I was going to buy a really tight tank top that says something like "Baby on Board" or "I have the golden ticket" but somehow I don't think I could pull it off... Is it my lack of cosmetic surgery or the ounce of pride I have remaining? besides, it's just too chilly for me to understand that kind of fashion!
Ha ha ha!! I laughed outloud. Have you tried Target? I'm sure you have....oh well, only, what, a few months to go? :) Nothing like cool breezes on a warm belly!
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