Poor poor baby #2

So today I spent my first dime on baby #2, who is set to arrive... let's just say, soon. I'm sure I'm not the only parent to go through this, but I'm starting off this poor child's life feeling terribly guilty about not giving him/her the attention that baby #1 got. Not that I had the nursery decorated and faux painted or anything, but I did have a few more things than a hastily-purchased pack of onesies, socks and a hat. I'm starting to wonder what is wrong with me. In my disorganization though, I think I did myself a favor. I lost a book. Last pregnancy I was going to read this book called *Prenatal Parenting* about the bonding you do with your baby in utero. You know, the importance of reading to, talking to and otherwise connecting with the unborn babe. The importance being if those things aren't done, you are sure to have a baby stuck in the NICU for at least 6 months due to neonatal depression. I guess they too can express suicidal ideation... hmm? Anyway, I'm glad I hardly cracked the cover because I think I would feel like I've just set #2 up with a life of Remedial Reading Group (yes, that is what our elementary school called it in my day). In my defense, we've had a TON going on this pregnancy and it hasn't felt like the single most important thing happening like it did with #1. To be honest, I also have a lot more anxiety about this one than the last one. There are a couple of women I know who simply do not enjoy baby #2, or at least that's what it seems like to me. I know that motherhood isn't just fun and games, but I guess I am hoping for more than drudgery and resentment. I feel like those women who question the wedding as they are walking down the aisle... There's no turning back at this point, it's going to happen soon, and I'm just not sure how I feel about it. At least this baby has a hat.